Let the Games Begin...

Day 2 at the Olympics; a couple of medals and some good showings by the Canadians - awesome. Around here; knitting on my shrug and contemplating some of the blogs and posts I have been reading. When I chose my project I really thought about what would constitute a challenge for me; I decided on my shrug because I have wanted to knit it for a while but knew I would keep putting it off because it wasn't like a must knit; more like a want to knit. I felt that the lace component would be a challenge and the decreases within the lace challenging but that it would be a relaxed knit and that was my challenge; to find balance and work in a manner that was more respectful of my fibro, CFS and lead poisoning. I have learned that stressing myself can and usually causes a regression and makes me ill. I never felt the need to justify what I was knitting compared to what others were posting, although I did feel some moments of panic after reading other's choices by thinking that perhaps I wasn't picking a project that would challenge my skills enough as a knitter. Which got me to thinking about how we judge ourselves and compare ourselves to others (in the world of knitting - how fast, how complicated, how much and with what materials) and how crazy this whole world of knitting can be sometimes and how sometimes knitting is not fun but more a pressure of deadlines and output (I know I am more of a product knitter than a process knitter) and how easy it is to succumb to the temptations of being caught up in the whirlwind and forgetting why I started knitting in the first place - not to please and impress others but to please and enjoy myself. I am a competent knitter and I know that I could have picked something more ambitious and worthy of my abilities but I am really proud that for once (because that has not applied to the multitude of knitalongs I have signed up for) I have decided to challenge my needs for self caring, self preservation, self respect and balance (and respect for my illness which governs me everyday and often tests my need to overdo). I am an Olympic athlete (pre-steroid and pre the pressure to perform for cash!)! The shrug is progressing well. I am getting close to the point of decreasing and setting up for the sleeve which is both exciting and a little nerve wracking (something new). I am really enjoying this knit which is eye opening for me - I am so glad that I picked the right project for me.

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